What is a routine?
According to the Cambridge Dictionary, a routine is a “usual or fixed way of doing things.”
A routine can also be described as a sequence of actions regularly followed, or tasks performed as part of a regular procedure rather than for a special reason.
However, I like the best Heidi’s explanation, published in her blog post: “Is it a habit or a routine? Know the difference.”: “Routines are a set of behaviors in a particular order that we do with some frequency but not automatically.”
Why do we create routines?
Dr. BJ Fogg, a behavior scientist and researcher at Stanford University who has studied behavior change for more than 20 years, argues that designing and individualizing a routine can lead to significant personal growth.
On a different note, I am a firm believer that in order for us to have the time and mental space for spontaneity (“the quality of being natural rather than planned in advance; a way of behaving in which you do what feels natural and good whenever you want to, rather than planning things first”), we should have a solid routine basis. Yes, sure, it sounds ridiculous to designate a “spontaneity slot” in your schedule but hear me out!
When we routinize some reoccurring, often mundane tasks, such as domestic chores, grocery shopping, or backing up our laptop, we can actually look forward to the more demanding items in our schedules.
On other occasions, we might break down the execution of challenging tasks to optimize our workflows.
And of course, morning-, night-, self-care routines, and so on. These we create to prevent decision fatigue – feeling exhausted when being regularly provided too many options to choose from.
But if there are so many positives about having routines, why do we so often fall out of them?
Why and how do we fall out of our routines?
Well, we fail to follow our routines primarily because they were not sustainable for us in the long term. And why is that? Here are four possible reasons why our routine might not be the right one for us:
It is is too challenging. Sometimes our best intentions to set ourselves for success result in us feeling even more unfulfilled. There is a fine line between a productive routine and one that is too complicated to execute.
It is is too mundane. Yes, there could be such a thing as a routine, which is too tedious. If we are mindlessly crossing off items from our routine list without feeling accomplished in any way, we might soon begin to wonder what is the point of following this routine in the first place.
It doesn’t bring us joy. As Gregory McKewon writes in his book Essentialism: “Today, technology has lowered the barrier for others to share their opinion about what we should be focusing on. It is not just information overload; it is opinion overload”. In this sense, a routine that seems so appealing to us might represent someone else’s identity, vision, and purpose and have no actual contribution to our own life.
Last but not least, there is one more reason, probably the most obvious one, for falling out of our routine – changing our life dynamics or our environment. Even if our routine is one that we follow with ease, determination, and joy, unforeseen events in our personal or professional life, or even planned events, trips, or holidays might have a negative impact on our everyday customs.
How to get back on track?
1. Detect what is the reason for falling out of your routine.
If you do not know why you cannot follow a particular routine, you cannot begin to make the necessary adjustments. This step is probably the hardest, and it takes a great deal of self-reflection and honesty. But don’t postpone it! The sooner you detect why you fell out of your routine, the faster you can get back on track!
2. Adjust your routine or start from scratch.
If you have detected a single activity in your routine that you don’t particularly enjoy (too challenging or too mundane), you might want to omit it, replace it, or amend it. You might want to adjust the timing (when), duration (how long), or regularity of a routine (how often)
However, if you realize that the whole routine doesn’t resonate with you, your lifestyle, objectives, and predilections, you might want to start designing your routine from scratch.
When adjusting or creating your routine, I highly recommend applying the SMART criteria. The principle originates from George T. Doran’s paper “There’s a S.M.A.R.T. way to write management goals and objectives” published in 1981. The principle is applied primarily in business environments as a clear and simple framework for goal setting and time management.
However, we can also apply these criteria in many areas of our personal life, when we want to clarify our ideas, focus our efforts, and use our time and efforts productively. Here’s what the acronym SMART stands for and how you can apply it when designing your routine.
- Specific: are the action items well defined, clear, and unambiguous. Is this routine specifically tailored to my needs, wishes, and desires?
- Measurable: What is my indicator or progress? Is it enough if I partially execute the routine, or do I have to follow every step?
- Achievable: Do I have the resources and capabilities to follow through?
- Realistic: Can I commit to it and execute it regularly? Is it realistic that I follow this routine regularly without feeling overwhelmed or unchallenged?
- Timely: when, for how long, and how often do I want to follow it?
3. Try it out!
You can never know if a routine is suitable until you intentionally execute it.
4. Allow yourself some time to get used to it and reevaluate
If you are starting a completely new routine, you might feel very eager and motivated in the beginning. But as we know, motivation wears off, and it’s discipline, which keeps us going forward. If following a routine takes tremendous effort and drains you, it might not be the right one for you.
On the other hand, you might also feel uncomfortable when starting a new routine. It might take some time for you to accommodate, but eventually, following the routine should become pleasant and fulfilling. If this doesn’t happen with time, you might want to reevaluate before completely falling out of it.
Conclusion
Remember, routines are meant to facilitate our life, not to make us miserable. In order for us not to fall out of our routines, they should be so straightforward that we can execute them with ease, yet so challenging that we feel accomplished when we follow them.
However, I don’t see falling out of a routines as a bad thing. Not being able to follow through, means that the routine was never good for you in the first place! When reevaluating and redesigning your routine, make sure that it’s comprised of behaviors, action items, and timing that are particularly tailored to our lifestyle, preferences, and possibilities.
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